(2007)
Dear Friends / Family,
It’s that time of year again! What a wonderful year it has been for all of us. The whole family has had a great year, full of memories and adventure. Where should we begin to recount how very blessed we have been? We have never done a Christmas letter before, but fortunately there are letter-writing tools available for people like us.
To start off, ______Deb___________ has been very involved in:
___ the mafia as a money launderer
___ restoring peace to Iraq
_X_ starting a homeless shelter for abandoned and battered cats
_X_ playing extreme Scrabble
___ empathizing with the warming globe
_X_ scratch and sniff lottery, but not for the money
Meanwhile, in ___Pennsylvania_____, ______Jacob_________ has been pursing:
___ world conquest
___ perfecting sleek and discreet flossing technique
_X_ an enriching career in hydrotherapy
_X_ rehabilitation of glue-sniffing ants
___ moderate success in minimal endeavors occasionally
___ study at the Palestinian glass-blowing institute
And last, but certainly not least, _______Luke_________ has enjoyed living in _Scotland & Minnesota_ while succeeding in:
_X_ teaching mute people how to walk
___ further developing fungus taxonomy
_X_ acquiring a wide variety of superpowers including, but not limited to:
___ infrared vision
___ super strength
___ the ability to melt
_X_ an uncanny ability to talk to fish, although they don’t usually talk
back
___ continued development of Opti-Grab™ technology
___ being macho
_X_ selling glue to ants
In short, we could not have possibly asked for a better year. Some people wish for a perfect life; we lived it, and we are so blessed. We could go on, but we are sure your lives are so much fuller than ours—and so busy too. We only wish that we could have shared each special moment with every one of you.
Sincerely / Love / Affectionately / Yours,
_______Deb__________ _______Jacob________ _______Luke_________

2 comments
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January 14, 2008 at 6:29 pm
erin
hysterical …
i especially got a kick out of “moderate success in minimal endeavors occasionally.”
December 2, 2008 at 3:13 pm
B.
THIS IS hilarious! I might use this idea (tailored for my own needs) for my Christmas letter this year! :)